the greatest (potential) gift

I'm not pregnant.

I have always imagined that I would be the type of girl to, once I was pregnant, climb on my roof, megaphone in hand (can't neglect my cheer background), and scream the good news to anyone in a five mile radius. I know lots of people don't subscribe to that mindset because they want to make it through the first trimester knowing everything is okay before making the big announcement. After all, if you miscarry after telling the world you're pregnant, you then have to face the world and talk about the miscarriage. I get it. But still, I've always pictured myself wanting to tell anyone and everyone. That feeling only intensified the longer Kevin and I tried to get pregnant. I mean, there comes a point in the land of infertility that you will celebrate just about any form of good news, especially the ultimate gift of a pregnancy.

With that said, I now give you our news. And I give it to you knowing that we very well may have to retract this statement and face you all with bad news later. I'm willing to take that risk.

We have picked a baby to adopt!!

She is so adorable that words just can't describe her. And I'm sure it's illegal for me to show you her picture, so you'll just have to trust me on this.

We got a referral email Tuesday, the first email from Holt with Korean babies. I cautiously opened it, having convinced myself that either 1) there were no girls listed or 2) the medical needs would be so severe that we wouldn't be able to take her.

Not true. God is so funny when He proves me wrong time and time again.

There were four babies listed, 3 girls and 1 boy. Of the three baby girls, we chose two that we were interested in, requested their files, reviewed them, and picked one to pursue.

I feel full with joy. I think I've told every human that would listen to me about our potential match. I guess this is what it feels like to be pregnant, huh? I have these crazy emotions of happiness, fear, anxiety, thankfulness, and about 26 others too.

So what's next?

From what I understand, if we're the only family that requested her, which is doubtful, she's ours. As long as we pass our homestudy, of course. If there are other families that want her, we have to go to committee and have the agency match which family is best for the baby.

We selfishly ask that you join us in praying for favor, but more importantly that this baby girl finds the best home for her. We just want it to be with us. :)

Sending Hugs (maybe sooner than we thought!)